I wrote this Throwback Thursday post in 2009 after I got caught unfriending guy on Facebook. Since I’ve pruned hundreds of people since then, this makes me laugh. Enjoy!
“Hey, can I ask you a question?” my coworker motions for me to come to his office.
I have no idea what he wants but I follow anyway. I’m curious and have a moment to spare. As he closes his office door, I’m waiting with bated breath. This one ought to be good.
He looks me straight in the eye and says, “Did you unfriend me on Facebook last night?”
First, I can’t believe the guy caught me in the first twenty-four hours. Second, I’m trying really hard not to burst out laughing in front of his face. I take a deep breath and say, “Yes, but it wasn’t personal.”
I broke down and joined Facebook last fall to be able to show my family photos of Rosie quickly and easily (“You mean there’s a site where you add a bunch of friends, upload pics and you’re done?” I said in astonishment.) I created an account, sent friend requests to my family and close friends and watched the magic of social networking technology come alive.
I found the whole Facebook thing amazing! People from grade school that I hadn’t seen in years found me. I reconnected with friends from high school, college and my old job. I found lots of moms from the site and it was fun to see them and their kiddos in real life.
As each friend request came in, I was elated to see an old chum or become better acquainted with a new friend. Within a week I had over a hundred friends. I was hooked.
I created my profile and added some pictures. It was fun to show my family and friends all the CB’s had going on. I’d update my status, post a few links and upload my blog. What a blast!
Shortly after I joined, I started to get friend requests nearly every day. It actually was quite fun. I’d log on to see what my friends were up to and SURPRISE, someone else wanted to be my friend.
I connected with a dear friend from grade school. She and I were best friends when we were Rosie’s age. It was fun to explain to Rosie, “When I was your age, we had sleepovers every week.” I facebook mailed my friend and told her the memory I shared with my daughter. She replied that she had the same conversation with her son that day. It made my heart sing!
I connected with friends in Kansas City. There were business people that I believed in, some that I admired and many that I just wanted to talk to without having to pick up the phone. Being friends had never been so fun!
One day, I went to click on a friend request, all bubbly with excitement. Couldn’t wait to see which long-lost pal wanted to know what I was up to. Problem was it was some guy from Argentina that I’ve never met. He was cute, but friending a stranger seemed creepy to me. I hit reject.
As soon as I had 200 friends, it seemed like every third friend request needed some kind of background check. I’d stare at the name, then the small postage stamp of a picture (sometimes of someone’s child or half their face so it didn’t make it easy) and try to place them. Often, I’d have to click on the “friends in common” to see how we were connected. If I figured it out, you were in.
One day, I walked into the office and a coworker asked, “Hey did you win your tennis match? You know, the big Tencap one?”
Hmm, I thought to myself. I never said a word about tennis. In fact, I’d been out injured. How did he know I played tennis this morning?
That’s when it hit me!! He’s following my status updates. He’s one of my four hundred friends! It was that moment that I knew that my Facebook was out of control.
As I logged on that night, I thought it creepy that someone at work would follow my every move. If he knew when I played tennis, then he probably knew what book I was reading and how my daughter’s recital went. I started to wonder how much information I wanted out there.
That’s when I made the decision to pare back my friends. I carefully looked at my list that night. I looked at all my friends and weighed how much I wanted them to know. I wound up cutting around thirty. Most of them would probably never even know.
A day or so later, I found myself in my coworker’s office, waiting for him to speak. He looks me straight in the eye and says, “Did you unfriend me on Facebook last night?”
First, I can’t believe the guy caught me in the first twenty-four hours. Second, I’m trying really hard to keep my composure (It was one of those moments that I had to pinch my side so I wouldn’t laugh). I take a deep breath and say, “Yes, but it wasn’t personal.”
“Well, I kinda wondered when I wasn’t getting any of your status updates anymore,” he said. “I even went to the top of my friends page and plugged in your name just to check. Then I asked Steve if he was still your friend. How come he is and I’m not?”
“Well, it’s not personal. It was a business decision. I just didn’t think that you needed to know everything I have going on. I was trying to separate my personal life from business.”
He looked a little hurt. “Hey, I didn’t mean anything by it,” I said. “I like you and think you’re a really nice guy. If you want, I’ll friend you again when I get home.”
As I left his office, I couldn’t help but think what guy checks out another guy’s Facebook friends? I couldn’t wait to post the situation on my status and get my friend’s reactions. Needless to say, I would not be adding him as a Facebook friend again.
Girls, have you had any odd Facebook moments?
Want a more recent Facebook post? Check out this Dramabook post from last month.